okay, let me think here.

my former printer/scanner combo doesnt work with my new computer. i have a cheap printer that is vista compatible, but no scanner. not that it matters since i havent been able to draw from quite some time now.

sometimes i actually almost feel like drawing. a glimmer, an echo, of that childhood joy whispers in my heart. or, at least, i think it does. nothing comes of it. the water chakra is blocked. i literally have permanent damage to my sacral vertebrae at exactly that point.

mike kaluta says that i need to just push trough these lean times. keep trying, keep drawing even if i think its crap. but, honestly, i cant even stand the idea of looking at my own work. its all failure and pain and loss. its all something i cant do anymore.

what a wonderful education MIAD provided, eh?

tony diterlizzi says to draw every day. i wish i could just pick up a pencil and make the magic happen again. nothing comes. i dont hear the voice of the muse any more.

its been over a year now. maybe two since ive even tried.

what am i if not im not an artist anymore?